adult male rape, trauma, Uncategorized

A DILUTION of ME TOO

I believe deep within the warm curves of my heart, that the current conversations encompassing sexual harassment and inappropriateness are all importantly valid. As all topics of discomfort are, I feel the daily mega stream headlines we are seeing today are all deserving of examination. I believe they have also come to fruition for the greater purpose of enlightenment and the brighter transformation of all people. The timing could not be more perfect for the evolution of fresh perspectives as we move forward through the climate changes of intentional sexual identification, conduct and respect .

On a cellular level I am more than familiar with the infrastructure of all of these disputations. I have experienced, healed, and triumphed through my own variety of life’s configurative platforms. I have profound respect for all who have spoken up and claimed their rights and freedoms of both voice and body around the world. I also have deep compassion and understanding for those who have continued to live in silence. And the countless list of brave warriors who have yet to meet their own inner empowered selves. I honor each individual experience as passionately as I do these rising topics of debate. (side note; applause to all on your journeys) 

I can only speak of my own opinion within these pages. One of my perspectives is that it is of equal value, to understand the materiality of both having a voice while harvesting an understanding of rape culture and harassment in positive ways, through education and or ones personal experience. It is also constructive to give voice and thought to any situations should an individual or group arise causing the pendulum of consciousness to swing in a counter productive motion.

When someone is seriously assaulted, I think it goes without saying that there is no humor to be found in either cause or affect. When someone is hit on, as most everyone is at some point on their earth adventure. Or an advance is perhaps taken in a direction that is not of their choosing, these to are not acceptable. I also feel that not all of these illustrated scenarios are equal to an assault as they may be portrayed in the arenas of “Big Press” as of late.

I realize some of my readers may argue my point of view and I am ok with this. What is important to me is the topic of clarity and the communicated word when going public with a statement of allegation. All words are valid, but words can be powerful, they can also be dangerous. As always choose your words wisely especially while illustrating conflict or resolve with another. 

I feel that it is critical to be as scrupulous as possible when in a moment of recollection. As we sit in our varied states of reflection. Especially when we are recounting interactions between ourselves and one or more about incidents of unwanted actions. Should projections of accusations begin to circulate, it is imperative, actually it is our obligation to both self and to society to be as pure as our cortex will allows us to be. To recount the movements of the moment through our verbal communications as well as our physical display, to the best of our abilities. Naturally trauma often makes this an impossible task for many. The concept of this writing, as you may have gathered rest on a loom of allegations more than a pedestal of legitimacy.

These writings are absolutely not intended to be about “victim” (a term I dislike) shaming or blaming. I understand my words through this segment may raise a brow or furled lip. This also is not my intent. My hope as always, is to remain open to both the light as well as the dark of all human experiences. I feel all aspects of life are of value and deserving of honor, it is what we learn and extract from each moment that allows us to evolve, should we choose. It is also up to each individual to evoke a culture of change. (my humble POV)

I do my human best to keep in mind that facts, voice and action are what create empowerment, not ego or the distortion of facts. I feel it is best to be discerning, in our hearts and thoughts as a collective, if we intend to ride purposefully onward with positive intent summoning healing while we advance as a people for future generations. As we heal the wounds of a #metoo manifestation. Keep in mind that this requires honesty, reflection, and a seeking spirt. Compassion and above all else love will take us to the next where we aspire. Love is the primary action of satisfaction that will mend all agitations that prod mankind’s desires for change.

The topic of words continues to rise up within me, I believe all words are good. The spoken word in conjunction with body language are two of the most powerful gifts entrusted to man. They can also be dangerous if used improperly, we see it each evening should we choose to dose ourselves with heaps of American Nightly News (insert a bit of laughter here). They may be counter productive to a cause of beautiful benefit when motives are not grounded in truth. Or when inserted as a tool of manipulation dicing up topics of importance. Particularly when fueled with a fear based desire opposed to respectful uplift-meant and positive intent. Always, choose and craft your words wisely especially when applying them toward any living creature, yourself, another, group or topic.

The words assault and rape are two impactful verbs, they are heavy and deserving of respect. Not only for what they represent as actions, but for the many who have walked through the narrows of discomfort and for those who continue to do so. These are the very souls who without choice faced the distorted powers thrust upon them. Abandoned in thick ponds of what many felt where an infinitude of helpless disconnect.

When words are tossed about recklessly via press or gossip, rooted solely in spectrums of ego and not rooted in actuality. They can unfairly and dangerously begin a witch hunt, destroy a family, career or community, through public humiliation or the unintended aftermath of false allegations. Obviously I am not referring to situations of factual physical assault, verbal abuse, rape or any other persistent undesired behaviors. I am talking about actual crimes of against mind and flesh.

AFTER CARE
It is within my clearest of thought that not only is it up to an individual who has experienced an episode or multiple episodes of aggression. Or in my perception an oppurtunity to evolve to greater life understanding, through their own experience and purpose. And to find appropriate care when they feel they are able to, if they are able to at all. To seek the support of loved ones, medical care, legal assistance and to eventually, if they should desire, carry out a message of hope to another who may still be suffering. It is also in my opinion that this is a positive oppurtunity for the encircling community to support an this individual through their composite of progress and diminishing pain.

Please bare in mind that many of us shut down or take on new patterns of behavior after an act of life disruption. Pay gentle attention to sub currents of new moods radiating post event, mild to severe. Often police or HR may not be contacted as emotions are bottled for reasons only known to the nervous system of those on the receiving end of an assault or harassment. If you sense something is up, my soft suggestion would be “If they don’t speak up, gently step up”! 

It is our fundamental right to participate in the wellness of others. It is actually a gift of living to engage in the betterment of our societies. Often it is the inheritance of fear based illusions that dictate to us that we “should” not be involved in interactions of unpleasantries. I encourage all to release the hype of this tainted thought. Listen instead to the love rooted truth within you and reach out. Surrender the well intended yet distorted teachings that many of us have been exposed to throughout our lives. Most all have heard them in our upbringings in one form or another. “It is none of your business” “They need time to heal” or “they want to be left alone”. While many of these these may be true, it is better to listen to your own “core” even when your gut feelings may feel new or uncomfortable at first.

It is ok to learn to step out our of comfort field of emotional vision and into what is right. If there is a change happening with a loved one or even a stranger, take a chance, take action and offer them your time and your presence. Listening is often more important than knowing what to say. An open ear and a warm smile can go a long way. This is often all that is needed, at times it can be just this simple.

ON DILUTION
I personally find it diluting to this very important topic to determine every advance as an assault, every grope or kiss in an environment of office, play or even home in hours of post convenient reflection as an act of unwanted aggression. Of course NO MEANS NO and YES MEANS YES! Cornered persistence and repeat situations along with a 100 areas of silvery gray variance come into play. It is up to each individual to use their wisdom to be fully honest with themselves when recall is required or desired.

Let us be careful about turning an EXTREMELY VALID and IMPORTANT moment of conversation and social change into another watered down political period of correctness. We should be seeking graceful forward motion with all causes. Avoid blind rage and the emotional white noise of mach protest as they only build barricades to justice. While detracting from the serenade’s of progress being sung as clarity and fundamental civil rights are set into place.

The point of a cultural shift, be it political, social or spiritual is to build a pathway of evolution not a division founded on singular needy spotlights. In other words, when your voice is valid, use it, stand by your sister, brother or other in need. DO NOT waste it when your ego is hungry for attention or locked in a mode of narcism, personal gain or out to destroy another living creature in a Wendy Williams-ish “hot topic” segment, with no genuine interest in social change.

My strongest belief is that we are all purposeful creators. We are all contributing to a climate of change, capable of supporting, loving and shifting the dynamics of tomorrow and the NOW. I am proud to be participate amongst like minded peers in this vast expansion. Politically, sexually, socially, culturally and spiritually. I truly believe we live in one of the most exiting times ever to be had. Furthermore I feel the #metoo movement, when in proper circulation is a powerful tool of uplift-meant, empowerment and change. 

As Always Love and Light
The Empowered Runt

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